There have been so many things happening to me lately. So many choices and things to think about. I'd like to take a vacation and disappear for a while. Yet at the same time, I refuse to leave because I feel like something will happen if I do.
My thoughts and dreams are off in another world where things are perfect and fall into place. But my body is here where everything is corrupt and life seems to drag on every day, repeating the same old things.
I have such a strong desire for individuality. I know that may not shock you, since I keep to myself quite a lot, but I was raised to be dependent on family. Each day I get older, I feel as if a huge part of me is missing. I've got my Jesus, I've got friends, and my family hasn't gone anywhere. So what is it? Well, someone to love. Duh. (JB song runs through mind)
Yes, I love my family and my friends. I may even love some of my friends a little too much sometimes...and I know I seem quite infatuated with spending time with one in particular, but I'm still waiting for the right one.
Quite frankly, part of my soul has left my body in search for this very special person. And so in a way, I have gone missing. And while my soul is out searching, I wander aimlessly through life, looking for opportunities to fill my time, new adventures to embark on, and ways to make myself different from the crowd.
One of these things I have taken on as an individual, is becoming a vegetarian. Mostly for health reasons (consistent food poisoning), but also because it is a challenge.
I like to cook, a lot. And this is a great opportunity to develop my food skills. I have to plan ahead (something I'm not used to), I have to buy mostly everything, but the hardest part has been learning to cook for 1 rather than 7. I tend to make enough food to last me a few days. Which is ok sometimes. But not all the time.
...falling asleep. To be continued.
