My Battle Part 6

I wasn't sure where I was. I didn't know what was going on. I couldn't see. Everything was a big blur. I vaguely remember seeing what looked to be a clock on the other side of the room (I was far sighted, go figure), but I couldn't make out the time. Some time must have passed before I was aware of where I was. My vision was slowly coming back. I was aware that I was extremely thirsty, and that there was a slight amount of pain on the right side of my head.

As I came to, I realized there was a nurse sitting next to me. She saw that I was awake and immediately asked me how I felt. Needless to say, my brain went into panic mode at that moment and I started freaking out. Right then the pain got worse and I just started crying. I sort of remember asking her to get my parents. She said she would do that in a few minutes once she was sure I was doing ok. I started to get hysterical. I told her I really needed something to drink. She offered me pepsi, apple juice, or ginger ale. I asked her for water. I never really drank soda, and I hated apple juice. She said she couldn't get any water, so I told her ginger ale then.

The pain was slowly getting worse, and so she gave me some morphine through my iv. NOT a good decision since I had an empty stomach. She got me my ginger ale and told me to sip it slowly. I did, and by that time, Mom and Dad came into the room. Dad asked me if I felt any relief at all since Dr. Pollock had told him there was so much pressure, that when he cut me open, there was a geyser of water squirting out of my head. And he apparently said that had not happened before to any of his patients. I told him that I could definitely feel relief of pressure, but the pain of the stitches (and the hole in my skull) hurt really badly. All of a sudden, I felt my stomach give way and I puked all over myself. I had worked myself up, and the morphine didn't help.

Needless to say, when that happened, a band of nurses swarmed around me, trying to clean up my puke, and keep me comfortable and not moving.  Pain surged through my head, caused by the exertion of strength and muscle movement I had just experienced. (you don't realize how much your scalp actually moves until it has 12 stitches in it) My blood was pumping, and my head started pounding. I almost immediately wanted to take back what I had just said and instead say There's no way the pain is gone dad! But I was too scared to say anything. I just wanted to sleep, and maybe when I wake up it will be gone.

They made me stay in the ICU for a bit longer til they were sure I wasn't going to puke again. Then they wheeled me into the elevator and took me upstairs to my room. Once we reached the room, they said they were going to lower the bed, and I would have to roll over onto the bed in the room. Piece of cake right? No, not really. I could barely move. The after effects of anesthesia are horrible. I tried to sit up and I fell right back down. So I tried to pull myself over onto the bed. I don't know how I did it. The nurses may have helped me. I just remember as soon as I got over onto the bed, they put this finger monitor on me that had a glowing red light in it. (basically a pulse detector) I was extremely exhausted, and hungry. I asked for food, but of course, when you vomit in a hospital, food is the last thing you can even look at. They said I had to wait. So I did, and I quickly got settled and fell asleep.

I don't remember how much time had passed before I woke up to my nurse checking my temperature and blood pressure. It was now dark outside, so possibly 3 hours I had been asleep. It was then that I realized there was another patient in my room on the other side of the curtain. It was a girl who looked to be about the same age as me. Her and her mother were playing cards. A few minutes later, my parents came into my room. I guess they had been with the doctor then went to eat dinner. They said that everything went great and I should be able to go home in the morning if everything went fine that night.

Just then, our pastor at the time, Pete Hipple, walked in the door with balloons and a giant stuffed dog. He wanted to know how I was and to let me know that everyone at FBC was praying for me. Let me tell you, that dog did NOT leave my side for the next few weeks. I still have her. She's so soft and cuddly. (yeah, that may be childish, but that dog means so much to me, and I don't let anyone touch her..haha)

Mom left not long after. They said only one parent could stay, so Dad stayed with me. I remember turning on the tv and watching Skylark that night. I'm pretty sure I fell asleep not long after it started though, and of course I woke up again to a nurse coming to check my vitals. And that time, I asked her for food and she said I could have jello and crackers. Yay! Except when she brought me it, it was green disgusting lime jello. So I vaguely remember taking a few slurps and then resorting to the crackers.

Dr. Pollock and a few of his assistants came to check on me periodically during the night. They shined a flashlight in my eyes, and asked me to use my arms, legs, fingers and toes. Then they shined a light on my head, and so on.

Note: Some of the things that went on during the night, I am choosing to leave out of this story. Please do not ask me about it. I try to block some things out.

I remember that the girl in the bed next to me also had her doctor check in on her several times. I really couldn't hear what they were saying, so I didn't know what was wrong with her. I just knew she didn't sleep nearly as much as I did. And she was happy too.

In the middle of the night, one of the monitors I was hooked up to started beeping extremely loud. I didn't know what was wrong. And no one ever came to check on me. After about what seemed like 15 minutes, it finally stopped beeping, and I was able to go back to sleep.

The next time I woke, it was morning, light was shining through the window, and the hustle and bustle of a hospital kicked into place. People were running from room to room, checking on each of the patients. There was a note from my nurse on the white board telling me to call downstairs and order breakfast. However, I couldn't move. I was hooked up to a billion monitors, an iv, and the fact that I still wasn't used to the after effects of anesthesia. So Dad called down and ordered. I remember having pancakes, english muffins, and eggs for breakfast. I was starving.

After breakfast, a new nurse came in. She had curly brown hair and to me, she was gorgeous. She also looked extremely young compared to all the other nurses in the night. She told me that she was going to give me some interesting liquid through my iv. It took a while before she found the right equipment, but she did it, and I felt basically nothing. When she was done, she removed the iv, and it was the first time I looked at my hand. It turned green. I was bruised. It hurt for the next few days.

Then, I was told to get up and try to walk around. That was probably the most difficult task I experienced that day. My legs did not want to move, and I had no energy whatsoever. It started off that I was extremely dizzy, and I just had to stand there for a while waiting for the room to stop spinning. It was noon before I was able to walk around and feel good enough for them to let me go home. They wheeled me downstairs with my dog, who I had affectionately named Josephine, and my balloons. Dad went to get the car in the parking garage, and drove it to the front door. I climbed into the backseat (since I was still 12) and I got my first breath of fresh air. I was ready for my head to start pounding like it normally did. But it didn't happen. :) I was ecstatic. Now if only the pain of the stitches would go away, I'd feel absolutely wonderful.

It was a long drive home, but when we got home, I got out of the car, and walked up the stairs by myself to say hello to my family. They were like "Ellen! Glad you're here! Now go get in bed!" What a welcome. lol But that is exactly what I did. Mom had gone out and bought me a few welcome home, get better soon presents. One thing I remember was these wall stickers of tigger and pooh with butterflies and flowers. I put them on my wall right beside my bed, and they are still there today. (you may have seen them in some of my profile pictures...since I am typically sitting on my bed when I take them. lol) I don't know if I'll ever take them down, although I have been tempted to lately. Simply because I am a college student now, and my room looks fairly childish. But no, I'm not going to remove them. They serve as a reminder to me, how wonderfully blessed I am.

The day I came home, was also Emma's birthday. I didn't want to ruin for her, and I certainly didn't think it was right for me to be getting gifts on her birthday. So I gave her something...I don't remember what, but I did.

I was asleep in my bed when there was a knock on my bedroom door. My Aunt and Uncle came in with a bouquet of 50 roses!!!!! And a bunch of cards and pictures from my cousins. If you didn't already know, there is nothing I love more than receiving flowers from someone. I LOVE flowers. <3 <3 <3 And that many roses made my day wonderful. They were all different pastel colors. GORGEOUS!!!

They left, and I quickly fell back asleep. I woke up around dinner time, and I was ready to eat. We had spaghetti that night. And I remember being so exhausted after dinner, and so in pain, that I needed something for my pain. They had given me a prescription for Oxycodine (I think) when I left the hospital. I was pretty sure I needed it. So I believe that Dad went to target to have it filled. When he brought it home, it said on the outside "Do not take if you have any type of head trauma." What the heck??? Why would they give me that? Do they want me to die? So I didn't take it. We had some regular Tylenol laying around and I took some of that. As the night went on, I developed a bit of a fever. They said if it reached 101, I had to go back to the hospital. And I can remember mom taking my temp and it was 101.1. But I REFUSED to go back. So I just went to sleep.

When I woke up the next day, I was fine. Still in a ton of pain. I wanted to get a bath so bad. I felt disgusting. But I was told I couldn't get my head wet for 5 days. I had iodine all over my head. I looked and smelled horrible. But I hurt to bad to care. So I basically just slept away the next few days. My grandma came over, and she had bought me a bracelet with tiny blue flowers on it. I loved it. I also was showered with cards and blessings the next few days.

When I finally was able to shower, I took my grand ole time. I didn't want to even touch my head. It really hurt just running water over it. There was no way I was brushing my hair for a LONG time either. But that was okay. I was only 12 and I didn't care what I looked like.

One week after my surgery, I had an appointment with Dr. Pollock's assistant. She was a nice lady, and she told me I needed to scrub my head. Ha..no way. It hurt too much. I had an MRI a few weeks later just to check up on things, and everything was looking okay. I needed to have MRI's every 3 months to make sure everything was looking okay.

I was just very happy to be able to walk and move freely without being in pain. Even with the limitations I had, I was quite joyful.

2 weeks later, I went to Bible quizzing with two of my friends from FBC. We took second place, and I wore a bandanna over my head. It was a great experience and God blessed me so much.

This is the conclusion my first battle with hydrocephalus. I will continue at a later time with my second battle.

I hope you have enjoyed reading my story, and I hope I have inspired you in some way.